Wilted Rose
by Ookami no Kuro
Summary: This is a songfic to some Good Charlotte song. Forgot the title. Sorry! n.n; Rath comes back from a demon hunt, and is injured to pretty much the point of death. Cesia thinks he is dead, and... Not telling it all! xD Rath's POV.


Ok, this is my first fanfiction, so no flames please? ..;; Ok, some flames, but be gentle. n.n; Ok, this is a songfic to some Good Charlotte song, which I forgot the name. ..; Sorry... If you know the name of the song, please review and tell me? n.n; I know, I'm a moron.

----------------------

I stumbled back into my room. My body was broken and bleeding. I lay down on my bed. I almost died fighting today. What happened? Why was I so weak? I tightened my already strong grip on my light dragon amulet. It hurt to breath. I probably would die this time. Why wasn't I happy about it though? Normally, I would've loved it that I was going to die. Maybe even cut myself up to help it go faster. But not today. Then she walked in. It was Cesia. She was smiling and happy. But she saw me and her smile fell. "What did you do now?" I tried to talk, but I guess I was weaker than I thought. Only air escaped my bleeding lips. "Why must you constantly try to die? It's really hard to keep my promise if-" Cesia stopped. "You didn't do this, did you?" I shook my head as much as I could, which was only bearly. She sat down beside me. I showed her a smile to say I was ok. But I wasn't really...

----------------------

_Lost and broken,_

_Hopeless and lonely_

_Smiling on the outside._

_A hurt beneath my skin._

----------------------

My vision was getting clouded. Had I lost that much blood? My bed sheets were a scarlet color. Stained with my blood. My hated life. Cesia put her arm on mine. Was it for affection or for my comfort? It didn't matter. I smiled up at her, pretty much all I could do. "I'll go get Rune..." She whispered to me. Yes, Rune could heal my physical pain. But what about my broken mind and spirit? Would they be whole again too?

----------------------

_My eyes are fading_

_My soul is bleeding_

_I'll try to make it seem ok._

_But my faith is wearing thin..._

----------------------

The world was darker now. Would Rune get to heal me, or would I just die...? My mind was so full of doubt. Would I could see Cesia's sweet smile again? Or Rune's worried look? The pain was so strong. I just wanted to end it. My lips mouthed promises to Cesia. My broken body colored the bed with warm blood. My mind said to just close my eyes and die, but my heart said to endure the pain. For Cesia. My body was dying. But I had to survive. Otherwise Cesia would be so hurt... Like... me?

----------------------

_So help me heal these wounds _

_They've been open for way too long._

----------------------

Rune ran in. He saw me there, on my now dark crimson bed. He saw my bleeding body and gasped. "Rath? How did this happen?!" he asked. I tried to answer, but I only got the same result as before. Nothing. Normally he would have yelled at me for leaving the castle for demon hunting. But this was too serious. He knew if I was to live, he'd have to heal me, fast.

----------------------

_Help me fill this soul._

_Even though this is not your fault._

----------------------

I coughed and sent drops of blood into the air. Rune put a shaking hand on my arm. What would happen if he couldn't heal me? I didn't want to die. I shuttered at my thoughts. Or I would've, if I could... I didn't want to die? Why was that? I didn't need Cesia. Why did I care what she thought?

Oh who was I kidding? I needed her. I always would, if I ever wanted a life away from pain. She made the pain in me die. She made the demon side of me lose control and fade away. If only that feeling could stay. I tried to imagine that kind of life, but I slipped away into sleep as Rune healed me.

----------------------

_That I'm open, and I'm bleeding_

_All over your brand new rug._

_And I need someone to help me sew them up..._

----------------------

I knew I wasn't dead yet... I dreamed... _I saw me as a child. I was lying on the cool grass. Fire was asleep beside me. I remember these days... So long ago... How I miss them... My normal self was watching as Fire and I slept. Then I felt something cold touch my sholder. Snow? Yes, it was snow, because now everything was white... Even the clouds were white. But then, they turned a dark gray. It snowed harder, and someone took the child form. Who was it? I followed them, hoping to see who took the younger me. He took us into some dark cave. Why did this seem so familar? Thoughts raced in my head, trying to get an answer. But then my eyes found one. It was Kharl. He had the younger me, the carefree me, the... happy me. I was forced to only watch on as the joy faded from the child... Why did my mind force me to relive this torture over again? Why...?_

----------------------

_I only wanted a magazine_

_I only wanted a movie screen_

_I only wanted the life I read about in Dream_

----------------------

My eyes were open now. My body was numb. There was no pain. I forgot how good this felt. Did he heal my mind? Or was it just numb, like the rest of me? Then sounds came back. Cesia was somewhere -I couldn't move to see her- crying. Why was she crying? Rune was making a noise too... Maybe he was crying like Cesia. Did they think I was dead? Or... WAS I dead...? I looked down, as much as I could. But I didn't see myself dead on my bed, so I must still be alive... Then I heared a voice, "NO!" It was Cesia... "He's not dead! I won't belive it! I'll just wake up tomorrow, and he'll be alive, and make me... breakfast?" Rune put a hand on her sholder. "Cesia, he's gone... I tried to save him, but I couldn't. I'm... sorry." "That's not gonna bring him back! I... I loved him... And now... now he's... gone..." She said between sobs.

----------------------

_Now my mind is an open book_

_And now my heart is an open wound._

_And now my life is an open soul for all to see._

----------------------

I tried to get up. I used every ounce of strength I could find. That got me sitting slighty up. Did she see me? I tried talking again. "Cesi-" That was all I got. Bearly a whisper. I knew she didn't hear it... Why was it that everytime I could tell her the truth, I could tell her I loved her back, that something stopped me? That wasn't fair... My now lost whisper did nothing. I slowly fell back into my bed. Maybe Cesia would notice....

----------------------

_But help me heal these wounds _

_They've been open for way too long._

----------------------

I could still watch her from where I was then. She had her back to me though. She was looking out the window. Out into the cool afternoon sky. "Cesia..." Rune whispered "Just leave me alone!" She yelled. Rune walked out. "Why did you leave me? Why did this have to happen...?" She asked the sky. Cesia walked over to me and sat beside me. I had closed my eyes, so I didn't have to see her cry anymore. "Why?" She asked.

----------------------

_Help me fill this soul._

_Even though this is not your fault._

----------------------

I heared her near me, and cracked my eyes open. But, of course, hers were closed. Closed, and filled with tears. Why didn't she look? I was so helpless. I couldn't even call her... I lay there, watching Cesia cry. She was the only one that mattered. No one else cared. They only used me. But she didn't. She tried to comfort me. She said they did care. She cared... Now told that more than ever.

----------------------

_That I'm open, and I'm bleeding_

_All over your brand new rug._

_And I need someone to help me sew them up.._

----------------------

She got up and walked back to the fogged window. How did she not see me? Maybe her eyes were too blind by tears... She walked over to my sword. "This is all I have left of you now." She said to it. "All I have left." She forced a smile. "Remember when I first arrived? You thought I was working for Nadil. How I will miss those days." Cesia took my sword in her hands. "I wish I could have told you all the things I didn't. If only I had one last chance to say good bye... I said I wouldn't let you die. But I guess I've failed you. Why did you have to die?"

----------------------

_So you come along_

_And I push you away._

_But I kick and scream, for you to stay_

----------------------

I tried to tell her I was ok. What I would give to say the simple words 'I'm still here...' But my voice failed me, just as Cesia thought she had. _If only something would make her know. Please look at me... Please? _I pleaded, yet no one could hear my desperate thoughts. I couldn't take it anymore. I wished she would either see me, or I would die, as she thought I was. _Just let it end. Stop her pain..._

----------------------

_Because I need some one to help me..._

_I need someone to help me..._

----------------------

"Maybe if I actually went with you, you'd still be here. Why didn't I go?" She asked the sword. "If only..." Her eyes were drowned by tears. She was stairing at the window. But her eyes were glazed, and unfocused. "I'll miss you, Rath... Will anything ever be the same? Will I ever forget?" She said. "But... I don't want to forget. I want to remember you. Because if I forgot, I'd lose something very important. I'd..." She stopped for a moment. "I'd be... I'd... I'd have no reson to live. Was this how you felt?"

----------------------

_To help me heal these wounds _

_They've been open for way too long._

----------------------

She sighed. "Yes, this must be it." Someone finally understood my pain. But I never wanted her to be the one. Why did she have to be tourtured like this too? "This must be it..." She said. "Now I understand." She grabbed the handle of the sword. "Now I see." She slowly picked my Dragon Sword up. "Now I finally know what you felt. The feeling that you are alone. That there's nothing left for you."

----------------------

_Help me fill this soul._

_Even though this is not your fault._

----------------------

"That you..." She paused. "Want to... end it all." She showed no emotion. Not sadness, fear, or anger. Only an emptiness that was painfully familar. Her eyes were blank, as she lifted the sword to her throat. "You wanted to end it. End the pain. Fill the emptiness. Fix your broken soul. But I held you back. I'm sorry I did. And now, nothing will hold me back."

----------------------

_That I'm open, and I'm bleeding_

_All over your brand new rug._

----------------------

Cesia took a deap breath, and gave the fatal slash with my sword. I used all the strength I could find. "Cesia!" I screamed out. She turned to me, her eyes showed a surprised look. "Rath... You're... Alive..." She said. I screamed for someone to help. Cesia lay on the ground bleeding. I couldn't even get up to comfort her, much less save her. I could only watch in horror, as she suffered the painful death that I had longed for.

----------------------

_And I need someone to help me sew them up..._

----------------------

End! n.n Please reveiw, so I know what you think. Ok, ja ne!


End file.
